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Post by yogini on Apr 14, 2006 12:40:39 GMT -5
I am open and ready for a soulful woman to enter my life. My thoughts are positive about finding a good woman and that is what I will draw unto myself. We often don't realize that what we attract is a reflection of ourselves. If we want to have joy, spiritual awakening, peace, and happiness we must first reflect it in our own lives. I am doing the work now so that when lady love and I meet we can really build something special and lasting.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 18, 2006 5:47:32 GMT -5
I agree with you yogini! There are many that are NOT ready though and they think they are. I am ready to DATE. When I say date, I mean meet folks and get to know who I vibe with the most before I make it exclusive. I don't want to isolate myself to one person's time just because we may find each other attractive based on a few things. I want to really know the person I commit to and they can't happen overnight or in a few weeks.
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Post by yogini on Apr 18, 2006 18:25:15 GMT -5
That is so true xpeerynceme. I really want to get to know a person. I think that you have to date more than one person at first or you run the risk of being exclusive too soon, and then it is based just on physical and the few things that you think you know about that person. I understand that we all want to be in relationships but if we rush into it we don't give ourselves time to really get to know one another and find out if we really even like each other beyond the initial attraction.
I am reading this book (actually listening to it on audio book) called "The Mastery of Love" by Miguel Ruiz, it is an amazing book because it helps you to get a better understanding of what love really is.
Peace
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Post by yogini on Apr 18, 2006 18:31:23 GMT -5
What is love to you? What is happiness?
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 20, 2006 18:16:13 GMT -5
Love to me is being able to accept a person for what they are not what I want them to be. If it's not right and I get involved...that would make me wrong. Love is wanting to continue learning a person after you have established a connection. I mean, learning them for years to come. Love is something you must have for yourself first before someone else can have it for you.
Happiness to me is when you are not complaining about everything; when you are able to deal with the changes of life and still smile and be yourself. I am happy now. I am always pretty happy. I look at it as being content. It doesn't take much for me because I don't expect much. When I say that, I am not complicated. Some folks you have to do certain things certain ways just to get a grin out of them. I like who I am and what I am about, where I am going and what I am doing. Happiness lives within that.
Maybe I went off the deep end with that...can you answer the same questions?
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 20, 2006 18:23:17 GMT -5
See now my mind is clicking because I haven't had someone to sit and just talk about this. Everyone has there own idea of getting to know someone...sometimes I think I am from another era or something. I often times like to pay attention to little things about a person that most others don't notice. I like to get deep but people don't seem to have time for all of that. I don't understand why. The more you know, the more you know if you should stop or go. Physical attraction is a minor part for some reason. It exist but how many people do you know that are just so good looking and they are ALL WRONG for you or you are ALL WRONG for them? A lot.
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Post by yogini on Apr 20, 2006 19:45:20 GMT -5
Wow xpeeryenceme, You have the same Ideas that I do about love. Love is something that I give freely, expecting nothing in return. Love is something so abundant within me that I want to share it with others. No a sexual type of love, but love that lets others know that I care and I am here for them as a fellow human bean . Love is allowing the other person to be themselves, flaws and all without trying to mold them, but letting them unfold into the person that the were meant to become, enjoying all of the twists and turns along the way together. Love is not needy, but open and receptive. Happiness is always there we just have to improve our knowing. Happiness is that state where no matter what comes to you in life there is a calmness a peace underneath it all. Happiness is not affected by temporary circumstances. Happiness is being able to smile and laugh even in the darkest hours. I don't know maybe I am confusing happiness and joy. It seems to me that these things are different but I am looking more for joy because...well.... hapiness seems to be temporary. Happiness changes the the wind. Happiness comes and goes, but joy is always right there lurking beneatht the surface of turmoil, trials, and triumphs. so I guess the real question is which would we rather have Happiness or Joy? With that definition I opt for joy!
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Post by yogini on Apr 20, 2006 19:48:11 GMT -5
PS I am still working to perfect the way I love. I now have a better theoretical understanding of what love is. Now I am putting it into action with my friends. It is a beautiful process. I find that I am more at ease and able to accept them (the not so perfect parts that we all have) better than ever before. I mean really accept, not tolerate! That is a huge deal for me. I am grateful that I am growing in that way. It has really changed my life and my relationships with my friends.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 21, 2006 0:14:18 GMT -5
I have been learning how to love my friends for years. It's a most beautiful process. I say it's beautiful because at a time in my life because of a lack of love in my household (displays of affection and a loving atmosphere) growing up, I would tend to be non-emotional with my friends. I got out of that over some years and learned to derive what I was missing from my friends. Friendship is such a beautiful thing and it can teach you much about relationships. It can prepare you for so much when it comes to romantic love. Some folks don't believe that but for me it's been a true thing.
My mother made me feel so crazy to show any affection to another female to the point I seemed to be the classic "homophobic". I mean, I would not hug or anything because my mother, along with the religion we were affiliated with, made same gender loving out to be so disgraceful and they really bad mouthed me when it was apparent I was leaning that way.
It's something how events in your life can lead you to different places and put you on different levels.
I don't think the dating scene in Detroit sucks, it's how people date in Detroit and wherever else. If you subject yourself to the right people...you are bound to have good experiences with dating. Dating is supposed to be fun and until you and a person say to each other..."I don't want to date anyone else but you"...Live your life and take it light.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 21, 2006 0:23:07 GMT -5
P.S. Even after you get exclusive...it should still be fun and always find ways to re-ignite that initial fire...travel back to the beginning...read to each other...pull out cards and letters that you wrote to each other. Pull out photos (take lots of photos) and marvel at the progress of your relationship. Feed each other and learn how to massage each other...there is so much that you can do to make things last and be wonderful. Make that person a haven and cherish what you have. Learn how to treat each day like there is no next day. Stop taking the little things she does for you for granted. Uplift each other. I could go on and on but you ladies know what I am saying.
It's 2:21 in the morning and I am so glad my office computer allows me on this site. I have to be here at work because my desk clerk could not work. I don't mind. I brought season two of the L word to watch but I have been checking in guests and on here.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 21, 2006 1:50:39 GMT -5
Okay...so I am a little bored here. I have sold a total of 69 rooms...funny it should be that number, but anyway...it's 3:43 in the morning and no more guests will probably be coming to this night window to get a room until the morning. I have to have 4 housekeepers here so it's not too much on just 3 of them...in the meantime in between time thinking about dating...I thought I would share a poem I wrote that might be along the same topic presented here. At least to me...it would be a part of dating. Here it goes: Good Head... (10/7/2004)
You tell me you want to caress my body What you should try to touch is my mind By getting to me mentally is the only way So stop talking about how you want that nasty grind Sweetie don’t you want to turn me on from the inside? You’d be surprised how that heightens my desire You’d be taken how within me that will ignite a fire When you challenge my intellect Eventually our passions will connect Attack my thinking process Before you attempt to undress Ask me about the things I miss Before you try and steal a kiss Don’t get me wrong, I want you too But I want this to be explosive, so this we must do Look deeply into the depth of my eyes Before you try and nestle between my thighs Make me a believer of the things you claim Only then will sensuality call out your name Don’t rant and rave about how much you are a freak For that is not the type of excitement I seek Can you hold a stimulating conversation by candlelight? Can you sit with me and hold me close on a cold night? Would you be willing to read poetry to me as soft music plays? I mean, we just met so can you handle that for however many days? What, why are you looking so puzzled like I said something complex? Oh, is it because all you wanted was sex? So, you can handle this? Well, that is what I am trying to see If you are truly real before you get the chance to feel Show me your skills, like if you really can give good head Not like that, but the kind that causes a mental orgasm The kind that will send my body into an intellectual spasm I am eager to see if you can keep me content I look forward to this different type of nourishment After we have mastered the mental of you and me I will then invite you to come lay next to me…
Copyright © 2004 Xpeerynce
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Post by yogini on Apr 21, 2006 11:32:40 GMT -5
Wow, what a beautiful poem. I was smiling the whole way through. I really like it! It seems to express how I feel. Yes relationships should never lose the fun and spontaneity. I want to be with someone who stimulates my intellect, my soul awareness,& divine friendship and vise-versa.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 22, 2006 4:58:24 GMT -5
Glad you like! Thanks you! I have more, trying to get a book of them together to get published.
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Post by xpeerynceme on Apr 23, 2006 5:48:46 GMT -5
I am going on the record to say that I am rusty as hell in the area of dating. Let's see...have I ever really been on one? I am talking about a real date. What is a real date anyway? Is that just something on a calendar?
Dancing... that is a whole different world for me. I am so used to dancing at home with MYSELF that I am even rusty at that. I know how to move but I think I just need the right music and some time. LOL
I do know one thing. Sitting across from a beautiful woman and really LOOKING at her is amazing. Watching how her eyebrows move as she says certain things. Watching how her nose crinkles at certain points of conversation. Noticing how she uses hand gestures to express herself. Appreciating her smile and trying to find ways to make her keep showing it. I could go on and on...
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Post by yogini on Apr 23, 2006 20:45:51 GMT -5
Yes I know what you mean. Looking in to the eyes of a woman that you feel so connected to is a very amazing experience. It leaves me wanting more.. Wanting to know and experience more of the beauty that is she.
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