GAM
Junior Member
What up doe?
Posts: 14
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Post by GAM on Mar 17, 2005 1:31:14 GMT -5
Is it me or do people not know how to date? Either they want to move ultra fast or they are making demands and have expectations as though we have been together for years?
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cocoa
New Member
Posts: 1
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Post by cocoa on Mar 17, 2005 20:31:19 GMT -5
I think that there should be a dating etiquette course. Most of the people I know jump into relationships as if they were changing socks. Then they wonder why it doesnt work out.
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Post by tlynn1974 on Mar 19, 2005 0:22:32 GMT -5
I think that when people get older and more mature, they want to settle down quicker, sometimes too quick.
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GAM
Junior Member
What up doe?
Posts: 14
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Post by GAM on Mar 20, 2005 0:04:10 GMT -5
How the hell can some people be in a hurry to settle down when their lives are in proverbial shambles? One cannot expect to be in a decent relationship if their minds are not decent.
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Post by popcicletoes625 on Apr 6, 2005 9:44:49 GMT -5
Why is it that when you find somebody you like, and things are going great from the beginning and you feel like this is the person you want to be with....after some time rolls by you start to see the real person, and you don't like that side of them. I wish I could meet somebody that doesn't let their "representative" take over them!!!
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Post by tlynn1974 on Apr 6, 2005 19:05:52 GMT -5
I have been out of the dating scene for a while, so sometimes I wish I didn't see the real side of my wife!!! ;D
But seriously, I wish people wouldn't be so flat out fake. You never know what you are getting into.
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GAM
Junior Member
What up doe?
Posts: 14
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Post by GAM on Apr 6, 2005 20:06:22 GMT -5
The "representative" is bound to leave sooner or later. Everybody is on their best behavior in the beginning. I dont understand why everyone is in such a hurry for a commitment. Dating is the process where you allow the "representative" to leave. I feel like females are in a hurry for a committment because they wanna trap you before the real them shows up!!!
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Post by popcicletoes625 on Apr 8, 2005 7:22:45 GMT -5
I think people are in such a hurry for commitment cause when they see a good thing they want to snatch it up before someone else gets a crack at it. Some people think that the b.s would be eliminated if they were in a serious relationship....but apparently these people don't know what I know!!!!!
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Post by Piscesswimminin on May 2, 2005 11:05:07 GMT -5
Hi Ladies, Here's my take on this dating seen. I think people put to much emphasis on the word DATE. Why not go out and hang out for a while.. Do it dutch...I know that sounds cheap... but it is safe. It puts no commitment or obligation on anyone. It also saves the role playing because once you start it...you're in it for the long haul. Haven't you heard that the way you get a woman is the way that you keep her. So, if you start off buying her diamonds and furs...she's not going to want zirconians and pleather later. Be real with yourself as well as with her, and stop trying to impress. Just have fun and get to know the person. Leave out the word DATE...until you're ready to get serious and see how much better that works out. P.S. I know you're probably thinking...you put more time into a date. That's where you get caught. You start trying to impress. I personally say, Put QUALITY and LOVING time into whatever you're doing or planning and it will always work out just fine. Stop preparing for the person...prepare for the occasion. (Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying you shouldn't look your best and groom for the occasion)
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Post by fleababy on May 2, 2005 17:06:28 GMT -5
I disagree about the dating scene in Detroit, (that it sucks?) All I can say is try to go out with those who are on the same page as you are, the expectations will be similar. If all you want to do is date, say so. If you are looking to find someone for a relationship (eventually) say that too. Just dont stop the dating once you are in the relationship! I love dating! whether I am in a relationship or not. A date to me is taking someone out that you are truely interested in or accepting a date from someone who you are interested in. UNINTERRUPTED, by the kids, the doorbell, the phone or the dog. Taking time out to look nice, the anticipation, the excitement of a racing heartbeat. A genuine interest, a nice,-fun time, respect and consideration of the others feelings and a little affection doesnt hurt either. This distinguishes a hang out time with your homie who just rolled through, from a date. It doesnt have to involve a lot of money either. or any money, that is only material. Just PAY ATTENTION! One of the best dates I ever had was on my living room floor, with a picnic food-basket, blanket, surrounded by candles and some slooooow dancing to jazz when it was pouring down raining outside. Ummmmn! Now that was a date....
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Post by tlynn1974 on May 14, 2005 11:41:09 GMT -5
Fleababy,
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE come give my wife some dating help!!! Please!!! ;D
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Post by fleababy on May 17, 2005 12:43:55 GMT -5
Date Tip! Go to the "Suga water" festival in July (26th) at the DTE outdoor concert venue. Jill, eryka,latifa, floetry! All of those women on stage, you and your honey out doors snuggled up with your blanket around you ... is sure to be a date you wont forget. Make sure you wear your sundress or shorts and sandles to show off those legs and manicured toes!
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Post by LadyDre on May 19, 2005 11:19:59 GMT -5
I have to agree a little bit with everyone. I think the dating scene does suck, somewhat. I think that we do attempt to commit to early. I think that we have unreasonable expectations early into our relationships. I think that people don't show their real selves initially when you meet. So with all that said, what do we do. It is so frustrating. I'm a single, well adjusted, spiritual, loving woman, but that seems to make no different. Same stuff, different day.
On a positive note, what we can do to make the dating scene better is to not do all the things mentioned in this email, but be ourselves and let the chips fall where they may. You gotta do you eventually so why not from the start.
Peace & Grace,
LadyDre
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Post by Akil on May 25, 2005 19:08:09 GMT -5
I think that the dating issues mentioned in this thread are prevalent anywhere you go. I recently moved from MI to NC and have been many other places, it's the same issues anywhere you go. Here's my question, what happened to courtesy and the rules of ettiquette when dating? It seems that many of the women that I come across these days are used to dating people who are needy, clingy, overbearing, rude and inappropriate in their actions when it comes to dating. The problem is that these women have come to accept and in some cases expect this type of behavior from those they date. Unfortunately this leaves decent people such as myself "on the curb" or completely "dismissed"! Ladies, do you NOT want someone to treat you with respect? To actually engage you in intelligent conversation? To treat you with kindness and courtesy? To keep our hands to ourselves and not try to rip your clothes off on the first date? To respect your time and your space and not be overbearing? To pay you a respectable compliment?
Some of us actually know how to love and respect our women. Why don't you demand and expect it?
Akil
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Post by stephanie on Jun 14, 2005 12:35:01 GMT -5
I must agree with you Akil, that decent people such as myself tend to be one of those dismissed individuals. Maybe one day, things will change for the better. Personally for me, I'm getting older and the desire for me to settle down is near and taking me on a roller coaster ride. It can be frustrating.
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